BDSM - FETISH - SEXUAL FANTASIES
BDSM Diversity and Variety
Something that surprises when studying the evolution of BDSM is its diversity. Although historically its roots arise from the sadomasochistic movement, when it develops truly as a unifying force, starting in 1992, it does so by grouping a wide diversity of sexual practices, hobbies and identities, to the point that that same diversity gives it one of its most important aspects. outstanding.
Currently, BDSM agglutinates strictly heterosexual individuals, homosexuals of both sexes and bisexuals as a subculture. To practicing and militant Christians, to agnostics and to people related to other religions or mysticisms. As for the practices, they range from the woman who likes to wear stiletto shoes as a fetishist element, constituting this her only non-conventional contribution, up to the high-grade masochist who links pain and pleasure.
All of them share a certain aesthetic and a common element: consensus and adult tolerance, under the motto: "Your taste is not mine, but I like that you can practice it". Only in the periphery of BDSM there may be some cases of intransigence towards the rest of society or towards other segments of the community, but it is something scarcely habitual in a culture that is usually distinguished by tolerance towards alternative ways of thinking.
The bondage is the practice of straps or ties on the human body, for aesthetic or sexual purposes. It is an anglicism (de to bind) which in turn assumes the tradition of shibari, a Japanese word for the art of stringed. It can lead to immobilization of the passive person, or not. Also, it can include or not the subjection of this to a fixed element, the partial or total suspension, etc. The strings are usually made of cotton or artificial fibers, but they can also be made of jute, rice straw, esparto grass, mix, etc. It is also understood extensively as bondage immobilizations with handcuffs, handkerchiefs, chains, etc.
Bondage can be part of a wider relationship, or practiced exclusively.
Flagellation and Discipline
Discipline is a generic term that describes the activities of those who like, by active or passive, erotic flogging, also called the practice of erotic flogging. It consists of the use of the hand to whip mainly the buttocks of the passive person (receiving in this case the specific name of spanking) or using an instrument, in which case the whipped area extends to legs, breasts, thorax, etc. , and there is talk of flogging. The classic scourge instruments in this last type of practice are the floggers or tail cats, the paddle, the canne or flexible and fine rod of ash or similar, the whip and the whip, among others. And also a host of instruments designed in principle for another purpose, such as hair brushes, shoes ...
Domination and Submission
In the BDSM scene, the D / s or domination-submission relationship is defined as a passive part, which adopts the submissive role, and an active part, which does the same with respect to the dominant role. In any case, it is based on an Erotic Power Exchange model (EPE), based on consensus.
This practice, unlike many others that are part of BDSM, is not defined by an Anglo-Saxon term, but is derived from Latin and is also known in Anglo-Saxon countries (by its abbreviation D / s), regardless of they often use the term EPE. Some scholars in the field intend to see in it another proof of the Mediterranean roots of this type of relationship and its greatest growth in Mediterranean countries, with respect to the Anglo-Saxon countries, where S / M relations are more widespread.
In the D / s the submissive or submissive denominations are used, in one case, and those of Amo - Ama, in the other. The denomination of Dómina or Mistress (for feminine dominants) is usually more used in the so-called professional feminine domination. Other common denominations, although not as frequent, are slave, Lord, Tutor and Master / Lady. The denominations of the dominant are often designated with a capital letter, and those of submisses and submisses are in lower case.
These types of relationships often assume highly elaborate rituals and complex symbolic contents that link their practitioners in a much more intense way than in other BDSM activities. In turn, a D / s couple does not disdain the use of any of the other practices contained in the BDSM. A session during a ritual D / s can be brief and improvised, or extend for hours, including bondage, discipline, fetishism, suspensions, explicit sex, use of the pleasure-pain binomial, etc. But always as a means of expressing their relationship; that is why some have it as the most extensive, interdependent and sophisticated form within the BDSM.
Sadomasochism is a generic term that defines relationships in which the pain-pleasure binomial has great importance as a means of materializing relations of power exchange. It is called sadism, on the other hand, to the active practice performed by people who feel sexual pleasure when punishing another.
Masochism would be the passive practice, that of those people who experience a sexual pleasure when suffering a certain intensity of pain. Research of a certain scientific weight made in the last two decades, lead to think that both trends coexist to a greater or lesser extent in every human being.
Fetishism is the use of symbols or fetishes to which they are associated, on the part of those who practice them, a special value, beyond their daily use or their intrinsic value. It can be a religious figure that is carried in the car to protect itself from an accident (religious fetishism), a garment that is granted by those who carry it the power to bring good luck (socio-cultural fetishism) or some stockings framing some legs feminine, that awaken in those who contemplate a strong erotic motivation (sexual fetishism).
In the framework of BDSM, the fetishisms that are related are those of sexual content, and the most common are those related to feet, stockings, boots, high-heeled shoes, underwear, uniforms, body hair -or the absence of it-, etc. There are therefore two types of fetishism in BDSM: that of the person who likes to awaken sexual motivations, for example, wearing high stilettos, and that of people who are attracted to the exhibition of the corresponding fetish.
Role Playing Games
It is the type of practice in which different social or gender roles are assumed during a BDSM session. Commonly the role play represents through fetishes the dominant and submissive condition, incorporating elements to the wardrobe that reinforce the intentionality of control and delivery. One of the most commonly used role-playing games is feminization, a situation in which the dominant woman (Dominatrix) forces the Dominate to wear women's outfits and make-up.
The concept of play is very common in an important part of the BDSM community. These are people who consider the practices related to their hobby as something of content, form and background eminently playful-sexual, scenic. In the vocabulary of these activists, there is talk of play, play and sexual role play, generally referring to those who take and play a role within a set consisting of a complementary pair: teacher-student, caregiver-pet, nurse- patient, master-slave, etc. There are some that receive a specific denomination, such as Age games or Age play (those of Adult or Caregiver and baby, and others). An essential element of this type of relationship is the EPE (Erotic Power Exchange or Erotic Power Exchange). This type of fantasies staged in practice a non-egalitarian situation as an element of sexual play, but are framed in relationships that, paradoxically, tend to be more egalitarian (outside the game) than many others from the rest of society.
During the session (or rather, in this case, during the game) the practitioners act following the behavioral models assumed in the character they interpret: if it is a caretaker-pet role, that one will use the language of those who speak affectionately (or with anger) with your pet, while whoever attributes this last role, will imitate in part the movements, behaviors and even sounds of said pet. At the end of the session, the couple regains their usual relationship.
Very different is the vision of another part of the BDSM community regarding the same elements. In this case, the participants also perceive that the relationship has large components of fantasy, but refuse to consider it exclusively as a scenic game, but they endow it with deep elements and a complex symbolism, which transcends the space-time of a session, impregnating also other facets of the life of the couple.
Types of Relations
EPE (Erotic Power Exchange)
Erotic power exchange, abbreviated EPE or EPC for others, means within the BDSM community "Erotic exchange of power", Consensual activities of erotic assignment of the will (or power). Given the cultural influence of the Anglo-Saxon sphere, it is likely that in the coming years the definition of EPE will gradually shift to that of D / s. Both describe the same situation, as the E.P.E.I.C. (Erotic Power Exchange Information Center), one of the most recognized worldwide organizations within the BDSM, which works in common with the International Maledom / femsub Guild, a society that protects BDSM groups with an Internet presence:
EPC is any relationship between adults who voluntarily incorporate the elements of domination (power) in their love relationships - and usually also in a large part of their daily experiences. E.P.C is better known as BDSM, S / M, D / s or sadomasochism, but all those terms are too limited, incorrect and often confused with stereotypes and mental disorders, so we prefer the denomination E.P.C. This can take any form, within a relationship. From the games of loving submission in a couple that makes love, to total relationships 24/7, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
The profile that adopts one or another relationship will depend entirely on the fantasies of its members, the pacts between them, etc. As long as they are consensual, informed, sensible, presided over by common sense and voluntary, the BDSM community will understand them as D / s, or in the Anglo-Saxon terminology EPE, Erotic Power Exchange.
BDSM and Sex
The importance of sex (understood as direct sex) in BDSM practices is varied. Two types of sensitivities to the issue coexist in the community. On the one hand, those who believe that BDSM is something that transcends what is directly sexual and does not require its assistance, and on the other hand, those who consider it a not only important but irreplaceable part of the BDSM experience. In this case, a North-South controversy can be clearly observed: on the one hand the Anglo-Saxon countries, and their areas of influence, more prone to the first conception, and on the other the countries and zones of the South, more akin to the second.
Polyarmony (or polyarmony) is a derivative concept related to polyamory, which is defined as a state where more than one intimate and simultaneous relationship coexists, with the full consent and knowledge of all parties involved, emphasizing the essences of honesty and commitment . But unlike the latter, polyharmony places emphasis on the harmonious maintenance of a relationship constituted by a dominant person, and two or more that develop the submissive role.
Although in BDSM this type of relationship is not infrequent (especially in D / s and S / M), its members usually encounter some difficulties for socialization within the community. There are no known studies on the subject, so that opinions in the sense that these difficulties respond to a traditionalist view of the couple by the collective, or that this reproaches the dominant polyharmonic that they "hunt" frequently in other people's preserves, they are still mere conjectures.
Some couples within the BDSM community frame their relationship based on the power structures configured in the so-called Erotic Power Exchange. The most extreme form of this type of relationship would be the so-called 24/7, where the couple (usually in the roles of Amo / a-submissive) extends the staging of their experience to the totality of the available time, that is, as if live permanently (24 hours a day, seven days a week) in the staged situation. In these cases it is still talking about roles, but carefully avoids putting the word game. At the same time, sophisticated ways are developed to combine the social, work or family life of the couple, with their purpose of remaining in the relationship 24/7.
This type of relationship also receives the name of TPE or Total Power Exchange, a denomination developed by the well-known activist Steven S. Davis in the debates of what has been the greatest intellectual enclave for the development of the world BDSM, alt.sex. bondage The TPE differs from all the other BDSM relationships, by rejecting the brakes and the limitations that these self-impose, but it strictly maintains the only element that gives the BDSM community a common framework: consensus. Davis himself wrote:
Things such as the security word, the relationship contract, the negotiation of limits and any other that recognizes, accepts or formalizes limits to the decision-making capacity of the parent, are alien to the TPE.
Practices Lists in the BDSM
Given the diversity that characterizes BDSM, it is difficult to describe the practices that most frequently occur in this type of relationship. We must remember that, for example, it is very possible that activists of bondage never practice any of the usual options in the subculture S / M. Perhaps it is the Domination - submission (D / s) the BDSM family that gathers the greatest number of practices, since in principle it assumes indiscriminately all those of the other groups, if the couple D / s seem appropriate to channel their relationship.
Anyway, there are the so-called "lists of practices" that list some of the most common.
Without forgetting the limitations mentioned above, you can count among the most common BDSM practices:
• Bondage (tie, ritualized or not)
• Wax (spill on the body)
• Tweezers (usually placed in strategic places: nipples, inguinal area ....)
• Ritual submission; doing sexual acts and other services according to instruction
• Ritual humiliation; use diapers or, for a man, wear panties and other women's clothing. Exhibit Offensive words.
• Flagellation or erotic torture
• Controlled sexuality and generally limited
• Various uses of certain signals (submission necklace)
• Equestrian domination (Mounting and / or exhibition)
• Dress code (for example, the renunciation of the use of underwear, of pants in the submissive role women ...)
• Lactation erotic
• Extreme sex practices (fisting, cbt, golden shower ....)
• Much more ...
Thanks. This article contains a total-partial extract extracted from the one published on wikipedia.org
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